I think I have finally Grown Up!

I think I have finally grown up :(. I am sitting here getting ready for
bed and I am looking at all my DS games and I don't want to play any of
them. The thing is I use to always want to play. I have been a gamer all
my life. Does this mean I have finally grown up?

I drew Blood!

I clipped my son's nails and I drew blood! I actually got him on his
thumb and then on his pinky! I feel awful! My husband doesn't make it
any better either! I think he is more tramatized then the baby!
~Breianna~

"Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one." - Albert
Einstein

Addtion to my last post

I forgot to mention that the Lactation Consultant said that she can't give use a nipple shield because she has to watch him feed a few times before she can write an order for one and since we where leaving Friday I need to get an outside consultant. Well now he's not going home and she could have watched him feed but now that's not going to happen. No breastfeeding we have to pump then warm the milk up for him. This is really the long way around!

~Breianna~"Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one." - Albert Einstein

I never had such a week!

I have never had such an up and down week! First I find out that my disability claim was denied so that I will no be getting a paycheck while I'm on maternity leave. CVS screwed up their paperwork so I'm the one left holding the bag! After about 20 phone calls over 5 days and lots of crying and yelling I think they have it fixed but it being Friday I will not know for sure till Tuesday because Monday is Labor Day.

On top of that being added to my already over flowing plate Baby Aric started off the week bad but after my husband did some research and checked out Cleftline.org we learned how to feed him and the Doctor wanted to try breastfeeding. We tried the breastfeeding on Wednesday night with no success, he didn't think it was a real nipple so he would not latch on. We decide that my pumping and feeding him that would be good enough because we just want him to go home.
Then Thursday Night came. The Doctor said that he was doing so good that he most likely will be released Friday or Saturday at the latest. He also asked if we would like a Fetal Monitor to make sure that his tongue didn't close over his airway in the middle of the night. I wasn't required but he recommended it. We said yes. Then talking to Baby Aric's nurse about breastfeeding she told us about a Nipple Shield that might help him. We just needed an order from a Lactation Consultant to get one. We were on air when we left Thursday Night. No only might we be able to take him home but he might be able to breastfeed too!

Friday Morning was chaos! On and off the phone with insurance and the hospital. Because we choose to have a Fetal Monitor we have to have someone from Apria Healthcare (the company that rents them) show us how to use it. This now means that he will not be released till we have someone from Apria show up. After Apria lost the first order that was faxed to them the social worker got another order in and was able to get someone out there today. Dodged that bullet! Then my husband runs in to my doctor on his way up with Shevyn to see Baby Aric and tells her he might be discharged today and that we called her office this morning about the circumcision and they told us that since I would not see the doctor because I was discharged last week that I have to bring him in to get it done. She told my husband to just have my nurse call her because she has a circumcision to do at 2:20 and she will do his afterward because she likes to do them in the hospital as much as possible. So the little guy gets his circumcision done. We learn how to do the Fetal Monitor and we are just waiting for a final order from the doctor.
5 o'clock rolls around and the Doctor tells us that he lost 16 grams so he can't go home now. He wants to watch him for the next day so Sunday is now the earliest he can go home! I'm almost in tears! I can't believe it, I was going to take my son home tonight but now I can't! After the doctor leaves the nurse tells us that 16 grams isn't anything to worry about because his diapers are 15 to 18 grams and he may have just had a diaper change before the weighting. This is so upsetting! We go from a Friday to Saturday at the latest release to now a Sunday at the earliest!

I've gone over a week of his precious life without bonding with him and now it will be even longer without him! I never got to bond with him the way I thought I would and now I can never get that time back! They took him as an over precaution and now they will not let him go! This is a great hopsital but I'm so sick of defensive medicine! A Cleft Palate is not something my son needs to be in NICU for!

~Breianna~
"Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one." - Albert Einstein

Aric is doing better!

Baby Aric is doing better! He is starting to eat more at each feeding, sometimes finishing it all! Yesterday he managed to pee and poop on me when I went to change his diaper! Daddy thought that was funny and I think so did baby Aric!

I love being his Mommy I just wish I could take him home already. The little time I get to spend with him here is just not enough. I want to have him home so I can be with him all the time!

We did try a new nipple for feeding this afternoon, the Nuk Nipple but the nurse changed him back to the Haberman Nipple. The feeding specialist that my Husband talked to on the phone said that he needs to stay on 1 type of nipple and not switch back and forth so I think we need to stick to the Haberman Nipple.

I pray we get to take him home soon!

~Breianna~
"Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one." - Albert Einstein

Milk Machine!

So I can't breastfeed baby Aric but I can pump milk for him. Since he is in NICU they bring me a Breast Pump to my room to start pumping right away. They tell me to pump every 3 hours and I can go 4 hours overnight. As long as I pump 8 to 10 times a day. So the first night I pump every 3 hours. This is all I can do for my son so I am determined to do it! Every time I pump I only get 1mL or less. I pump like clockwork every 3 hours between trips to the NICU to visit my son. I don't get a lot of sleep because if I'm not visiting him I'm pumping or getting my vitals checked by all the nurses. I am drinking a ton of water but by Saturday before I leave I get up to an all time high of 15mL then to a full 30mL or 1/2 oz!

I'm still very depressed about this, the thing is I told myself that my baby would never have formula and that is exactly what is happening! I talk to a lactation consultant and she lets me know that it is completely normal not to get that much and that I will not really start producing milk till 3 - 5 days after birth, closer to 5 since this is my first child.

The Lactation Consultant also recommends that I rent a Breast Pump because I will not have a child at home to stimulate milk production. So I rent one of the hospital pumps, the same one I had been using while I was there and they are the only pumps designed to stimulate milk production. They really do work because by the end of the day Sunday (I was discharged Saturday) I am pumping a full 2.3 oz! At least I can do something good for my son when I can't be the one to care for him all the time.

~Breianna~
"Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one." - Albert Einstein

Baby Aric has Arrived!

So I woke up at around 6 a.m. on 8/27/09 Thursday Morning and felt a little uncomfortable, my chihuahua who was sleeping behind my knees took off and went to sleep with my husband. I rolled over and went back to sleep. My alarm went off and I got up at 7:30 a.m. I felt a little trickle run down my leg, I just thought it might be some extra discharge. As I go about feeding the dogs I feel a little more and then a little more to where a puddle collects on the floor. I then wake my husband and tell him that "I think my water broke" in his sleepiness he says "sit down, note time, call doctor". I call the doctor and she tells me to head to the hospital, go to the 4th floor and they will test and see if it is amniotic fluid. I had a doc appointment at 9:50 that morning anyway so I decide to take a shower and get dressed. My husband takes a shower and then we head out the door after we got all my bags, pillows, and makeup kit. We arrive at the hospital at around 9 o'clock. I never ate breakfast or even took my prenatal vitamin so I am hungry! They will not let me eat because it came back positive that my water has broken so I am being checked in and taken to Labor and Delivery.

My doctor orders pitocin to get me to contract because I wasn't contracting. This is not how I wanted to start my first childbirth, I've heard pitocin makes your contractions very hard compared to natural contractions. About 20 mins later the pitocin is working and I'm get contractions. They start off about 3 to 4 minutes apart but they are not too bad. My doctor comes to see me at about 12:30 and checks that I'm only dilated by 1 1/2 cm. My husband and I talk to her for a while she tells us that they baby will be awhile. My husband then has to go, his customers need stuff done and he promises to be back soon. He brings me my pillows and bag before he leaves. My contractions start to get worse and I ask for the pain meds they put in your I.V. That works for me I go all the way to 3:30 when my contractions start to hurt really bad! I mean I'm really rethinking my no epidural policy! My husband gets there and I tell him that I might want an epidural he asks if I'm sure and I tell him no but then a very large contraction occurs and I say I might go ahead and take one. They check my cervix and I'm dilated to 9 cm and this kid is coming now!

My doc then comes in and checks my cervix again and I'm at 10cm! They break the bed apart and get me in the stir-ups and tell me to get ready push. The doc then tells me that after my next contraction when I feel the urge to push to breath in and then push. After only 29 minutes of pushing Aric Logan was born at 4:29 P.M. on Thursday 8/27/09. I got to hold him for 5 mins and the the doc had to start stitching me up as my husband got to take pictures of the baby and hold him.

What happened next was unexpected. They came over and said that he has a little fluid in his lungs and that he was going to the transitional nursery to be checked out and I don't get to keep him for the first few hours. They never brought him back. I finally got to see him again at around 8 o'clock that night. They brought him to my recovery room and told me he has a Cleft Palate and he had a dusky spell (he stopped breathing) and so he has to go to NICU.

This was just the beginning of our ordeal!!

~Breianna~
"Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one." - Albert Einstein